slowly she turned

The biggest thing I plan to do today is stay out of my bedroom. As a recovering agoraphobic, it becomes my cocoon during times of great stress. When it is this cold those blankets beckon me. I bury my thoughts in reading novels and playing games and puzzles for those addictive dopamine hits. It helps (or hurts) that Pablocito pretty much spends all his time on my bed these days. He is much better and is eating canned food without too much complaint, and he has caught a couple more mice. But I know from experience that I am not cured of agoraphobia and I have to be ever vigilant not to get sucked back down into that hole.

Anyway, I managed to take a shower last night and watched some reruns of Better Call Saul and Doc Martin on Pluto TV on my Kindle. Tonight I’m going to try to hang out in the living room with Sandy and watch Northern Exposure again. I’m in the middle of two very different novels about Ireland: This is Happiness by Niall Williams, and The Searcher by Tana French.

I logged out of Facebook and Instagram for a week, and I deleted my Threads account. I am building community on Bluesky (@slowlysheturned) but I’m not leaving Meta yet, since I would lose valuable connections with friends, family, and artists from all over the world.

I subscribed to Hearts of Space again and it has helped to keep the ambient music going, especially at the times when my husband is listening to political news. I’ve been a fan of ambient music since 1978 when I first heard the choral students at Governor’s School East practice some harmonies outside and it transported me to a peaceful place at a time when I was quite unhappy. Then when I worked for an local bookstore chain in the 1980s/early 90s, we sold cassette tapes by Windham Hill and I played them in the store often.

My daily (sort of) practice now is to weave only six wefts across on a tapestry diary for each day, color-coded to reflect temperatures, weather, and occasionally mood. The last time I attempted a tapestry diary was in 2018, when I started out daily, then weekly, then monthly, and finally quit altogether as I had sunk into deep depression. I’m not saying that won’t happen again, as I am deeply depressed right now, BUT I have crocheted a temperature scarf before and really enjoyed it. My friend and teacher Tommye Scanlin published a gorgeous book about fiber art diaries called Marking Time with Fabric and Thread. It includes several friends of mine so it is a pleasure to use it for inspiration. More about the tapestry diary later, since this is really a catch up post about my life in general, and I have more to say about the diary.

We are smack in the middle of a polar vortex right now, and the unusual part is that it is much colder and snowier to our south and east. We got the edge of the winter storm last night so the street and ground has a light cover of white. I’m keeping the faucets dripping inside as a precaution against surprise plumbing bills.

It’s been mainly the mud from the melting snow and ice from a couple of weeks ago that has kept me from moving into the studio in the back. This North Carolina Piedmont red clay mud has sticking power. It’s one of the reasons that we have a local pottery craft center. After tracking it in over and over, I decided to wait. I’ll put down cardboard on the floor of the studio the next time I go out there, as we have in the back room of the house.

But the little studio is going to be great, and I’m sure it will lift my spirits once we get it set up. The new roof is on, new insulation installed, the steps replaced, and the drywall ceiling patched and replaced where there were leaks. The shed on the side has a new frame, latticework, and doors. A lot of stuff inside can now go under the shed, because I stored yard and gardening tools and supplies inside when it got to be so viney and such a mess that it was difficult to get into. There was an extra pack of shingles so I put them down on the ground under the shed. It does need a new door and I have a ceiling fan that can be installed later.

The next step, once I get more of the stuff out, is to put down carpet tiles on the plywood floor. After we got an estimate on carpet we decided that we could do this part ourselves. I mean, it’s gonna get paint on it anyway so why spend a lot of money? Mainly we need some padding for our backs and for warmth. Once we get the tiles down, we’ll add extra rugs or remnants or tiles on top where we’ll tend to stand.

Sandy has laid claim to one corner, where he intends to set up his easel and paint. I’m planning to use the big heavy tables I found leaning against the walls behind the shelves (woo hoo!) and this will mainly serve as my book arts/mixed media/natural dye studio. I’ll take my small tapestry projects out there on the basis that I’m not going to store them or any yarn or fabric out there. They will need to come back inside the house the same day. The Macomber and Shannock looms stay inside. (I might sell the Shannock.) We have an oil-filled radiator heater, and I’ll probably replace the window unit air conditioner once it gets hot.

The next thing I plan to do once I post this is weave yesterday’s weather entry on the diary, then I’m going to finish preparing the cartoon for my next tapestry. I’m going to warp the Mirrix and a small travel loom for the workshop I’m taking with Tricia Goldberg next week in Tucson. I need to prepare some sample cartoons for this workshop, and I thought I’d use sections of the larger tapestry I plan to weave. I’m staying with a dear friend of mine in Tucson, and this trip is a very bright spot on my horizon.

I’ve been invited to participate in another exhibition at the Continental Club, but it has a Valentine’s Day theme, and I’m not sure I’ll do it this time. I didn’t sell anything at the Christmas one, but it was a lot of fun so I’m sure I’ll continue once I get my bearings again.

I applied for Paper and Book Intensive, which happens in Michigan in May. Several years ago I applied and didn’t get in, so I’m not going to get my hopes up. I’m also signed up for Helen Hiebert’s “A Paper Year” ongoing classes, despite my dismal experience with online classes (wholly my bad) and my dislike for Zoom, but it’s monthly and if I’m not doing it by the end of February I’ll cancel it.